I believe both Mom and Dad will have distinct ideas in this area; so input from both parents will be invaluable.This awareness will go a long ways in ensuring that your daughter doesn’t have a broken picker—that she won’t fall into the trap of dating boys who are not good for her.
Even as I was trying to stop Jackie from dating, it was my hope that when she did start to date she would have strong standards for a boy.
In the years since, I have asked my daughters what they are looking for in a boy and to write up a list.
"A 12-year-old who looks 16 isn’t ready to date someone who is 16," Anthony says.
You may not love the idea of your child beginning to date, but don't try to pretend it’s not happening.
What are the three most important personality traits that you think he needs to have?
What kinds of school activities do you want him to be involved in? Then, encourage her to measure every potential suitor by her list.
"Parents can be so uncomfortable with the idea of their kid becoming more grown up -- we wish our kids could stay kids," Atkins says.
"The problem with that attitude is that your kid still is a kid.
PREPARING YOUR DAUGHTER FOR FUTURE HAPPINESS It is our job as parents to help our daughters make smart choices about whom to date and to teach them how to identify the difference between the thrill of attraction and the stability of attachment.
The ideal time for discussing these issues is before your daughter even begins dating, but even if it is too late for that, these conversations are worth having. Talk with your daughter about what the make-or-break character traits in a man are so that she can accurately assess potential boyfriends—and eventually a potential spouse.
Instead, if they answer your questions or seem eager to date, you can steer the conversation toward reassuring them that these feelings are normal. Are they just trying to keep up with their friends?