The main arguments in favor of polygamy are the existing families with multiple wives, whose position is now not protected by law, as well as shortage of men.
Perhaps the fate of the third or fourth wife is better than being alone?
But during the following weeks Tim slowly told me about Jane’s diagnosis, her illness, the fight she put up and her preparations for death.
In Muslim countries where polygamy is allowed, a man can have up to four wives, each of the wives has to be provided with a separate house.
All the houses are built according to the same design so the wives do not feel deprived.
I learnt that she was shy and quiet and took a long time to get to know someone well. He didn’t want to admit that his wife was going to die but she insisted they talk about it.
She contacted WAY (an organisation for those who are bereaved at a young age), got their leaflets and saved them for him.
Being with someone whose first wife has died – a wife he loved very much – has the potential for a difficult subsequent relationship: a past love that can never be matched (not that it should be a competition), a woman who doesn’t grow old, rosy-hued memories that will only ever gain lustre, worries about comparisons that can’t be checked face to face.
But it hasn’t been like that for me, partly because of who Tim is, but also because of the person Jane was and what she did before she died.
Peculiarities of life in a polygamous family have long become a familiar topic on Muslim forums and dating sites.
There are people on these forums asking for advice on how to improve relations between the first and second wife.
If you fear that you cannot take care of them (i.e., wives) equally, marry one, "says Surah An-Nisa.